Author Topic: TTC buddy  (Read 55591 times)

Offline AngelaFox

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Re: TTC buddy
« Reply #3600 on: October 06, 2018, 04:38:18 PM »
Do men not get paternity leave where you leave? In uk, if you don’t do shared leave, then men are entitled to 2weeks off when baby is born but the employer doesn’t have to pay so it’s kind of like unpaid leave. It might be that some employers do pay for it. We haven’t checked it for my husband as it’s just too early. But he is a teacher so he gets a good share of holidays anyway so he can spend more time with kids then as i won’t get as much annual leave.

Offline JustPeachy

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Re: TTC buddy
« Reply #3601 on: October 06, 2018, 09:27:25 PM »
Ria, if the lesions are really bad, they can sometimes be spotted on an ultrasound or felt during a pelvic exam, but you can have it and not see anything on scans and there isn't a blood test that will tell you either. So if you have a lot of the symptoms it definitely might be worth considering again. Maybe they just assumed your symptoms were due to the PCOS, so wasn't worth investigating the possibility of endometriosis any further since it does require a surgery to diagnose. Not necessarily something you'd want to rush into, but would definitely be worth it if it helped get your baby.
Angela, we have family/medical leave he could have taken when Sadie was born (he was only at his job a couple weeks before our first was born, so on hiring probation and no benefits), but it's unpaid and with medical bills (insurance only covered pregnancy/birth expenses after we hit deductible and max out of pocket pay for family) and such we needed the paycheck more than he needed to be home. My mom was able to stay with us for a few weeks after Sadie was born, so I had some help while healing and adjusting to having 2 kiddos which was awesome.

Offline Ria1712

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Re: TTC buddy
« Reply #3602 on: October 07, 2018, 03:33:04 AM »
That sounds nice peachy. My mother in law has offered for us to stay with her until baby is born and then buy our house but I don’t want to settle and re settle. I’m hoping when I do have a baby my mum moves close to me as she has mentioned moving a few times but my brother won’t and she’s worried that she won’t be there if anything happens to him with his disabilities. My partner gets two weeks off paid for his paternity and has good holidays if I need him home at any other points if not he will take it before he has his 3 months so I can help him get into the routine. Going to speak to my doctor about endometriosis on Tuesday so hopefully will get checked.

Online Settledgirl

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Re: TTC buddy
« Reply #3603 on: October 07, 2018, 04:32:06 AM »
Hello ladies I’m back after sometime to get my head around things Iv been in and out of hospital for around 3 weeks now I was diagnosed 4 times that I was having a MC but it actually ended up being an ectopic pregnancy I had a shot of MTX last weeks my counts before this was 300 there now 1000 I’m currently in hospital waiting for my day 7 blood results to see if I need another mtx shot this has been the longest most draining soul Destroying time of my life. Iv been off work for 3 weeks. Work has been very shit about it all and I just feel they couldn’t care less they just want me back ASAP.

So that’s my update lol

I read something earlier about spotting and I agree with Angela no spotting is normal I kept getting told it was but I’m end it was ectopic related! Always go to A&E and push them for answers because they just wanna fob you off all the time being under 12 weeks as I stands I’m still currently pregnant I would be 8 weeks this past Friday x

Offline AngelaFox

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Re: TTC buddy
« Reply #3604 on: October 07, 2018, 04:33:56 AM »
It’s ridiculous how much these things cost in usa! It’s good though your mum could stay with you! We haven’t thought about when mine will come over because it is too early and she lives in different country!

Offline AngelaFox

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Re: TTC buddy
« Reply #3605 on: October 07, 2018, 04:41:31 AM »
Oh Settledgirl, that’s tough. And I am sorry that this is so much more than just standard mc. Can I ask how did they diagnose its ectopic? With your levels rising it actually could suggest a molar pregnancy. It can also be ectopic and molar at the same time. I have seen few ladies to have it on my molar pregnancy support group on facebook.
Spotting in pregnancy can be normal. Cervix can get too sensitive. My mum spotted all first trimester with my brother for no reason. I have been checked and everything is fine with me. But I am cery sorry that your spotting was bad news. I know how it is as in my first pregnancy spotting was bad news too. It’s one of those things that can be either way and needs checking as thats all they can do.

Online Settledgirl

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Re: TTC buddy
« Reply #3606 on: October 07, 2018, 04:45:00 AM »
Iv has several internal scans and they located something in my right Fallopian tube they didn’t say much about it they was just like it’s a failing pregnancy in the right tube and show me where it was. Iv been told to wait 6 months before ttc again I never in my life thought I would have all this trouble xxx

Offline Ria1712

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Re: TTC buddy
« Reply #3607 on: October 07, 2018, 04:51:01 AM »
Hey settled girl, sorry to hear what you are going through. I always say we know when something is wrong and to push for something to be done but sometimes things can go unnoticed. With my mc I had a little bleeding and cramp and just new something was wrong but when at the hospital they said everything was fine baby was still moving and heartbeat was normal. I refused to leave and asked if I could wait for my partner and that they show him that things were fine too, they agreed and he was still half hour away by the time he arrived the heartbeat had weakened. I knew from the day before something was wrong but just thought it was in my head. No matter what stage in pregnancy if you feel something is wrong get it checked. We are all here to support you though Settled girl and whenever you need to chat or rant we’re with you. So sorry for what your going through and I know they say 6 months but take as long as you need.

Online Settledgirl

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Re: TTC buddy
« Reply #3608 on: October 07, 2018, 04:57:13 AM »
Thank you ria.

I’m just so upset that Iv had this with my first pregnancy! Now I’m even more desperate to be a mum! And what hurts even more every time I go for a blood test I’m in the scanning room with all the expectant mums waiting for there scams all excited that’s the worst part . And I just think that should be me. Why hasn’t life chosen to take this away from me this is all Iv ever wanted to be. A mum.
It’s been taxing on me and my partner he’s cried a lot too. I can’t say Iv been mentally able to take it in. I’m not sleeping at night anymore Iv lost all intrest in everything I do. Works really stressing me out. I feel one big ball of mess.

Online Settledgirl

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Re: TTC buddy
« Reply #3609 on: October 07, 2018, 04:59:48 AM »
I mean Iv took myself out the scanning room, because Iv just been sat there like like a 17 year old girl being so inconsiderate and bitchey and childish saying this hospitals a shit hole I don’t want this first thing my baby to see is this place” I’m like are you having a laugh you’re allowing someone with that attitude who’s barely an adult herself now there’s nothing wrong with young mature mums but you and immature mums is another thing I just thinkkk whyyyyyyyy :(

Offline AngelaFox

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Re: TTC buddy
« Reply #3610 on: October 07, 2018, 05:00:14 AM »
It does take a lot of you when you go through something so rare as ectopic and molar pregnancy. I wasn’t allowed ttc for 6months either. I know it seems like a very long time but honestly the time just flies! And ut helped me morally to get to the right place to ttc. Right now you need to focus on your health to make sure that your hcg gets to negative and you don’t lose your fallopian tube. There are support groups for ectopic pregnancy on fb and I strongly recommend to join as talking to other ladies who actually been through the same thing helps the most as they will be the only ones to fully understand you. I know the wedding planning might be a last thing you want to think about now but focusing on wedding planning could help you with those 6m just pass by so much quicker too. And also i am very sorry that your work is not supportive. You really don’t need that pressure from them now. Just say you got doctors note and you will come back when doctors say you are fit to come back. Going through rare loss and have a chemo shot on the top is enermous amount to take don’t let them to stress you more. Also one more thing, joining ectopic group will help you with a vetter understanding of treatment and what you should expect from your doctors in case they don’t do enough!

Online Settledgirl

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Re: TTC buddy
« Reply #3611 on: October 07, 2018, 06:39:32 AM »
Finally got my results the first MTX shot didn’t work and now I have to another one but they can’t do it today and it has to me tomorrow!

Offline AngelaFox

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Re: TTC buddy
« Reply #3612 on: October 07, 2018, 07:16:27 AM »
I hope the second shot works Settledgirl.

Offline Ria1712

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Re: TTC buddy
« Reply #3613 on: October 08, 2018, 01:43:29 AM »
Hoping that this shot works for you settled girl and don’t worry about work my old work was like this when I was in hospital you need to concentrate on you and your recovery.

So tonight has been the worst night, last night I started bleeding again so still no idea what’s going on. Then woke up at 6am to my partner being sick so been awake since when I’m shattered but don’t want to leave him alone.

Offline AngelaFox

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Re: TTC buddy
« Reply #3614 on: October 08, 2018, 04:45:59 AM »
I have started bleeding bright red blood and started cramping too. On my way to hospital but it doesn’t look good.