Author Topic: Ex bf wants to have sex  (Read 487 times)

Offline mtpd

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Ex bf wants to have sex
« on: January 23, 2019, 12:11:17 AM »
My Ex and I were together for 5 years. I broke up with him over a month ago because he was a liar and he seems like he didn’t want to be in a relationship. I was stupid for telling him that I want tobe friends with benefits since we both have needs. We had sex after a few weeks of breaking up but I regretted it and it made me feel used so I told him that it was a mistake and we shouldn’t do it again. Now he keeps texting me trying to convince me to do it again. As much as i want to because I miss him I know that it’s bad for me because I’ll never be able to move on. Any advice on what to do?

Offline LinkleBlue

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Re: Ex bf wants to have sex
« Reply #1 on: January 23, 2019, 05:21:08 AM »
Tell him to back off and if he doesn't want to block him. Being friends with benefits with an ex is an awful idea as you won't be able to move on. You'll just keep regretting it if you keep it up!

Offline mtpd

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Re: Ex bf wants to have sex
« Reply #2 on: January 29, 2019, 03:35:04 PM »
I’ve told him so many times to back off but he still text me once in a while. I just don’t have courage of blocking him since we have a dog together and he lives with him. I still love him and I know he’s just using me. :(

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Re: Ex bf wants to have sex
« Reply #2 on: January 29, 2019, 03:35:04 PM »

Offline LinkleBlue

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Re: Ex bf wants to have sex
« Reply #3 on: January 30, 2019, 05:25:09 AM »
Well you need to distance yourself from him for your own good. How do you plan to do that?

Offline mtpd

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Re: Ex bf wants to have sex
« Reply #4 on: January 30, 2019, 10:49:33 AM »
I really don’t know yet. The other day he was messaging me again about that I told him no a bunch of timesz He said fine and that he won’t ask again. His family have been asking me to come by their house when he’s not there to see them coz they miss me. Do u think that’s a good idea?

Offline LinkleBlue

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Re: Ex bf wants to have sex
« Reply #5 on: January 31, 2019, 05:26:00 AM »
I don't think so. At least not yet. My ex's family did the same, but you need time to heal and for that, you need distance from all that is him, that includes his family. Besides, he could go home if he knows you're there and catch you by surprise. You don't have to block them from your life, but going to their house and being with them is gonna make the breakup harder for you!

Offline mtpd

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Re: Ex bf wants to have sex
« Reply #6 on: January 31, 2019, 06:55:35 PM »
How do I tell them that in a nice way? I don’t want them to think that I want to ignore them too

Offline LinkleBlue

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Re: Ex bf wants to have sex
« Reply #7 on: February 01, 2019, 05:24:24 AM »
Mm... maybe try teling them the truth nicely: "I'm sorry, but I need some time to heal from the relationship and unfortunately you guys were a part of it. I don't want you to take it the wrong way, but going to your house and spending time with you makes it harder for me to move on" or something of the sorts.
If they feel offended don't feel bad. It would be selfish not to understand you in this situation.

Offline mtpd

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Re: Ex bf wants to have sex
« Reply #8 on: February 01, 2019, 09:29:04 PM »
Thank you so much! It’s been really hard for me :( I don’t have that much friends and my family are always busy. I literally feel so alone. I feel like there’s no good day just bad days. My world just revolved around my ex so it makes it hard to start again. I lost him, my dog and his family. Idk when I’ll be ok again.

Offline LinkleBlue

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Re: Ex bf wants to have sex
« Reply #9 on: February 02, 2019, 05:58:41 AM »
Dedicate your time to discover yourself now! All your time is yours again. Try different activities and you'll see how good days happen again. It will take a while to , but you'll find yourself not thinking about him one day and realise the healing is starting. try distracting yourself in the meantime with your favorite hobbies

Offline mtpd

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Re: Ex bf wants to have sex
« Reply #10 on: February 02, 2019, 01:44:05 PM »
I’ve been trying to distract myself. I’m even trying to paint to have a new hobby. I’m scared what if he find someone else? Or what if he moves on before me? I try not to think about that but it’s very difficult. I want to have my self confidence back again

Offline LinkleBlue

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Re: Ex bf wants to have sex
« Reply #11 on: February 03, 2019, 07:36:53 AM »
It's normal to think that, just try and brush it off and keep distracting yourself until you stop caring about that. It seems now that you'll never stop caring, but you  Also try to hang out with your friends more, so you remember there's others that love you and more people you can have fun with!

Offline mtpd

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Re: Ex bf wants to have sex
« Reply #12 on: February 04, 2019, 07:30:23 PM »
Thank you! It’s so hard because I only have 2 friends and they’re always busy. When I’m homr alone i feel so depress. But I’m trying to find new things that can get my mind off of what happened.

Offline LinkleBlue

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Re: Ex bf wants to have sex
« Reply #13 on: February 05, 2019, 05:21:30 AM »
I understand. You keep the distractions coming until you don't need them! And you're welcome! I'm glad I could help! :)