Author Topic: 50 50 with boyfriend of 2 years  (Read 309 times)

Offline 90210

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50 50 with boyfriend of 2 years
« on: January 31, 2019, 04:16:00 PM »
So I've been with my boyfriend  for nearly two and a half years and I've been having real doubs lately and idk what to do, I'll do a pro con in points cause cba to write a novel.. In short i have something very simular to endometriosis (always bleeding) and i notice certain points of my period i get really strong break up signals - anyone else get that?

Pros
- we're literally SO on level with the same personality the same music taste we're so perfect in that way
- his so loving and has perfect morals, his a soppy mofo but i do love it

Offline 90210

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Re: 50 50 with boyfriend of 2 years
« Reply #1 on: January 31, 2019, 04:23:50 PM »
Cons
- his got no motivation, we've had SO many arguments in past with me getting upset that we was meant to be  at 1 for example and he'd wake up at 12 so its like he obvs don't care about meeting me??? His changed a big ngl but he knows it bothers me when we lye in bed till 1pm cause i lye there bored, i wanna be with someone who has motviation and wants to take me places and have fun I'm 21 ffs not 40

- I'm like the mom in the relationship: i plan EVERYTHING i think of everything to do, and when i moan he'll panic like 'ill change ill plan more' does ir once and then back to his own ways

For his birthday i took him away to capital of norway for 5 days as a suprise... i don't give to receive but but my birthday he took me a day to chester??? Like erm? We had a massive argument and he said i made him feel guitly but what girl would be happy about that!!

And not to be shallow but these things also bother me: his skinnier and the same height of me so i feel fat (im 5"5) - and part of me just wants to be  with a guy that'll take me out and someone with motivation, i don't want to loose what we've got so idk what to do

Offline 90210

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Re: 50 50 with boyfriend of 2 years
« Reply #2 on: January 31, 2019, 04:26:02 PM »
Pros
- we're literally SO on level with the same personality the same music taste we're so perfect in that way
- his so loving and has perfect morals, his a soppy mofo but i do love it
I obviously love him to pieces and his my best friend but i feel like compatibility it might be getting to the point where I'd be happier with someone else..

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Re: 50 50 with boyfriend of 2 years
« Reply #2 on: January 31, 2019, 04:26:02 PM »

Offline 90210

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Re: 50 50 with boyfriend of 2 years
« Reply #3 on: January 31, 2019, 04:26:44 PM »
 Sorry this is everywhere - i couldn't fit my full messege!!!!

Offline LinkleBlue

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Re: 50 50 with boyfriend of 2 years
« Reply #4 on: February 01, 2019, 05:43:25 AM »
His cons are not something (I think) that anyone could tell you "yes break up! He's useless!" Because those are normal flaws that anyone could have. Personally I wouldn't take him waking up at that time as not wanting to see you. If he's demotivated it would be smart to try and find out why. Does he hate his job? Money problems? College problems?
I think you should do two things: make a list of things that you wouldn't want to have in a partner and must have's for a partner. Apart from that, help your bf with his demotivation, for that flaw is usually not a con, but an issue he may not be aware about. Help him find out. If that turns out to be him, then go to your list. Evaluate whether he's worth to you, do you really think you could find a better partner? Or is it just the heat of the moment?

Offline 90210

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Re: 50 50 with boyfriend of 2 years
« Reply #5 on: February 01, 2019, 08:20:11 AM »
Hi, I've helped him with depression over a year ago,  made him go counciling as he was putting it on me all the time and it's really helped him, we've had so many talks on it, his at uni from home and goes to bed late and does nothing with his day, his just lazy and I've helped him with so much, money, consoling his depression which really effected me, helped him and suggested little things if anything I've been like his mom how much I've helped him, and he doesn't appriciate i had to push for hom to take me out for a thank you meal cause i did him a site and social plan to help his music and he didn't see the point.
 just feel like u give so much and do so much in this relationship and in return get nothing from him and im fed up.. but i can't bring myself not to be with  him

Offline LinkleBlue

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Re: 50 50 with boyfriend of 2 years
« Reply #6 on: February 02, 2019, 05:53:15 AM »
I imagine you have done this but, have you told him that? like an actual conversation where he understands this is more than a regular fight. In the end you need to be happy in your  so you should talk about that and actualy work on it together, if you still feel unhappy then maybe you should break up. Because why would you be with someone that doesn't make you happy?