Period Diary Forum

Other => Relationships => Topic started by: EmaMarion on July 16, 2018, 09:52:53 PM

Title: First Time... idk if I was raped or not though.. it a long story
Post by: EmaMarion on July 16, 2018, 09:52:53 PM
So... a few days ago I had my first time sleeping with my bf. it was definimy weird... here's basically how it went:
(I'm 17)
His parents had been out that night so he invied me over and for a while we just did studies and stuff . Until he leaned over and kissed me. We eventually ended up snuggling on the couch for a little bit and making out. We stopped and talked about our plans for sex and foreplay so, after we mapped the plan out we went up to his room and tried to go at it. The first couple times he tried to get his penis in me it wouldn't go in... I guess it was something about it being too large and my first time. After a while we used lube.... and it went in... sry if I'm being graphic but... I need to tell someone and my mom can't know... anyways..... when it first went in it burned a little and it hurt. He kinda pushed just the tip in first but.. I told him to wait. I was nervous. After a while we repositioned to be more comfortable and ended up with him on top and my legs around his waist... again, sry if it's too graphic... when he finally got the whole penis in it hurt so much it made me want to cry... I told him to stop and started instantly crying... he didn't stop and kept thrusting harder and harder. After a while he stopped and apologize for doing it and l, slater a shower we sat on the couch with no clothes on... we laid next to each other and kiss... after awhile he asked me if I would give him a bj....and ... this was gross to me but... I didn't want him to be aggressive again so.. I didn't say no but also didn't day yes... he put it in my mouth... afain, sry for graphic... I need to know... and for a while he didn't cum... when he didn't cum he shoveD it deeper and I choked but couldn't say anything.. then he cummed
. After he cmed he wrapped his legs around my stomach and put it back in my mouth... the next day he acted like nothing had happened and ever since we have been having protected sex at least 3 tomes a dau... it summer for us... so... question was it rape or not.. I don't know if I should report it...
Title: Re: First Time... idk if I was raped or not though.. it a long story
Post by: Darken12 on July 17, 2018, 01:03:06 AM
It was obviously rape if you did not want to do those various things. I personally would report it! But then again, if your bothered by it, why do you keep having sex with him?
Title: Re: First Time... idk if I was raped or not though.. it a long story
Post by: LinkleBlue on July 17, 2018, 06:02:32 AM
I sort of understand where you're coming from. With my ex, that wasn't the exact case but he put pressure on me to do things like that, so in the end I gave in without wanting to do stuff.
I think in your case it was rape, you didn't want to do those things and he continued, especially with the BJ, where he wouldn't let you answer before shoving it in your mouth! I think you should tell your mom :/ or a close friend to help you say it to someone, and of course, you should break up. You're with an agressor and you're afraid of him!
Darken, imo she's afraid of saying no :/ Unfortunately, it happens and you find yourself stuck there just agreeing to things to avoid a confrontation.
Title: Re: First Time... idk if I was raped or not though.. it a long story
Post by: EmaMarion on July 17, 2018, 10:33:03 AM
Thx you guus... he was over last night and a similar situation played out
.. :-[
Title: Re: First Time... idk if I was raped or not though.. it a long story
Post by: Darken12 on July 17, 2018, 05:26:47 PM
 STRONG LANGUAGE: Oh hell no. Leave his a**. That’s disgusting. He needs to stop doing that. I think you should break up with him.
Title: Re: First Time... idk if I was raped or not though.. it a long story
Post by: LinkleBlue on July 18, 2018, 05:41:18 AM
:( break up with him!! :(
Title: Re: First Time... idk if I was raped or not though.. it a long story
Post by: Ajjjj on July 18, 2018, 09:25:03 PM
If he was making you do things that made you uncomfortable and you didn’t want to do it, then that’s rape. You should definitely leave him especially if things like this continue to happen. I’m sorry that you had to go through that
Title: Re: First Time... idk if I was raped or not though.. it a long story
Post by: Funnytime on July 20, 2018, 08:16:00 PM
Guys I know what her bf did was wrong and all but that doesn’t mean u have to be all rude about it. “U should’ve reported him” “u need to break up with him” that’s all in her choice. It sounds like ur pressuring her. Tho she didn’t like like and that kinda was rape but not completely, she let him do it to her. Also, she probably like’s him a lot to let him do that so yeah. I’m not saying that it’s all her fault nor that ur being really mean about it but just remember that they are together for a reason. Also, to emamarion, if u don’t like what he is doing make sure u make it loud and clear that U DONT LIKE IT! He probably does that cuz he it turned on by u since he probably like u that much. Sorry it was so long but had to say it. I don’t mean any of this in a negative way
Title: Re: First Time... idk if I was raped or not though.. it a long story
Post by: Funnytime on July 20, 2018, 08:18:14 PM
Opps srry there was an auto correct. Also, to remember, if u don’t like what he is doing...
Title: Re: First Time... idk if I was raped or not though.. it a long story
Post by: Hue on July 21, 2018, 05:53:32 AM
How does it make you feel now when you engage in sexual inter course? Do you feel like you have the choice to say yes or no? Do you feel like if you say no he might get more aggressive with you? Are you afraid to express yourself in this situation? These are some of the questions you have to ask yourself.
Personally if I find myself in a situation where I feel powerless, if I can’t chamge it I walk away and that’s saved me a lot, emotionally and otherwise
Title: Re: First Time... idk if I was raped or not though.. it a long story
Post by: LinkleBlue on July 21, 2018, 05:59:49 AM
Funnytime, no one is being rude, we're being realistic. And no one is blaming her, we're giving proper advice.
It is true she could talk to him about and tell her she doesn't like it but the truth is, if that's what he's into, and she's proven not to be into that, their relationship is bound to end at some point. The guy kept going while she was crying! And "apologized" and then forced her to do oral sex to him.
It'd be better to end it before it gets worse, especially considering this was her first experience! It will scar her and if she stays there it could mess up with her vision of sexuality.
Also, saying "she let him do it to her"... that sounds a lot more like being rude about it. She was clearly scared of him being agressive, she states that.
Title: Re: First Time... idk if I was raped or not though.. it a long story
Post by: Darken12 on July 22, 2018, 06:59:44 AM
Funnytime, no one is being rude, we're being realistic. And no one is blaming her, we're giving proper advice.
It is true she could talk to him about and tell her she doesn't like it but the truth is, if that's what he's into, and she's proven not to be into that, their relationship is bound to end at some point. The guy kept going while she was crying! And "apologized" and then forced her to do oral sex to him.
It'd be better to end it before it gets worse, especially considering this was her first experience! It will scar her and if she stays there it could mess up with her vision of sexuality.
Also, saying "she let him do it to her"... that sounds a lot more like being rude about it. She was clearly scared of him being agressive, she states that.
exactly!
Title: Re: First Time... idk if I was raped or not though.. it a long story
Post by: Capriceee97 on July 24, 2018, 06:46:36 PM
So... a few days ago I had my first time sleeping with my bf. it was definimy weird... here's basically how it went:
(I'm 17)
His parents had been out that night so he invied me over and for a while we just did studies and stuff . Until he leaned over and kissed me. We eventually ended up snuggling on the couch for a little bit and making out. We stopped and talked about our plans for sex and foreplay so, after we mapped the plan out we went up to his room and tried to go at it. The first couple times he tried to get his penis in me it wouldn't go in... I guess it was something about it being too large and my first time. After a while we used lube.... and it went in... sry if I'm being graphic but... I need to tell someone and my mom can't know... anyways..... when it first went in it burned a little and it hurt. He kinda pushed just the tip in first but.. I told him to wait. I was nervous. After a while we repositioned to be more comfortable and ended up with him on top and my legs around his waist... again, sry if it's too graphic... when he finally got the whole penis in it hurt so much it made me want to cry... I told him to stop and started instantly crying... he didn't stop and kept thrusting harder and harder. After a while he stopped and apologize for doing it and l, slater a shower we sat on the couch with no clothes on... we laid next to each other and kiss... after awhile he asked me if I would give him a bj....and ... this was gross to me but... I didn't want him to be aggressive again so.. I didn't say no but also didn't day yes... he put it in my mouth... afain, sry for graphic... I need to know... and for a while he didn't cum... when he didn't cum he shoveD it deeper and I choked but couldn't say anything.. then he cummed
. After he cmed he wrapped his legs around my stomach and put it back in my mouth... the next day he acted like nothing had happened and ever since we have been having protected sex at least 3 tomes a dau... it summer for us... so... question was it rape or not.. I don't know if I should report it...


Im sorry, reading this made me sick to my stomach.
“I told him to stop and starting crying instantly.” “he didn’t stop and thrusted harder and harder”.

Firstly, you told him to stop, at that point you were no longer consenting to have sex with him. That fact that you were crying after asking him to stop and he continued scares me. 
Secondly, ladies yes if she does report it the police will ask why she had sex with him again, but she disn’t even know if it is rape, she is asking us because this has clearly freaked her out and is now looking back in the situation.
Thirdly, reporting it is 100% your choice, only you can decide if you want to do that. But I do believe you need to leave him, after watching you cry while he was continuing to penetrate you after saying stop, regardless of whether he apologises, I don’t see any respect for you or self control of himself to stop when being asked to.
Title: Re: First Time... idk if I was raped or not though.. it a long story
Post by: EmaMarion on July 27, 2018, 08:22:20 PM
I'm so sorry to burden you ladies with this but... thank you... I've broken up with him since and reprinted him... his court date is tomorrow... he's proceeding to stalk my house and social media... thank you all for being so understanding
Title: Re: First Time... idk if I was raped or not though.. it a long story
Post by: Darken12 on July 27, 2018, 08:26:28 PM
I'm so sorry to burden you ladies with this but... thank you... I've broken up with him since and reprinted him... his court date is tomorrow... he's proceeding to stalk my house and social media... thank you all for being so understanding
Your such a brave girl for doing this. But you might want to make sure your with someone at all times if he’s stalking your house, because what I’ve heard about him, he might try something.
Title: Re: First Time... idk if I was raped or not though.. it a long story
Post by: EmaMarion on July 29, 2018, 07:16:10 PM
Ok... thank you ladies.. you're all amazing!!
Title: Re: First Time... idk if I was raped or not though.. it a long story
Post by: Capriceee97 on July 29, 2018, 08:07:02 PM
I'm so sorry to burden you ladies with this but... thank you... I've broken up with him since and reprinted him... his court date is tomorrow... he's proceeding to stalk my house and social media... thank you all for being so understanding

He’s already going to court? That’s incredibly fast for this kind of case, especially as it’s your word against his, well done for being brave and reporting him, you’re very lucky to have had him arrested and for it to already be going to court
Title: Re: First Time... idk if I was raped or not though.. it a long story
Post by: Livepeaceful7 on August 06, 2018, 01:23:49 AM
If you didn’t like what was happening and he didn’t listen than yes that is having non consensual sex which is by definition rape. Now once someone makes you uncomfortable you have to have more self respect for you self to stop dating him and possible putting yourself in that situation again. Be a strong willed women and stand strong. I’m so sorry that happened to you.