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Messages - emmaloucoy

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Relationships / Boyfriends mother is driving a wedge!!!!!
« on: May 08, 2019, 02:28:11 PM »
So recently me and my boyfriend have decided we’re going to do a year abroad and work in a different country and he’s planning on going to college so he’ll have a qualification before we go. I’ve spoken with my family about it but he hasn’t told his family yet as he’s afraid of their reaction (he’s the only one in the house that drives and his mother and brother are very dependent on him to get around). I think she’s wised up that something is going on because she is now trying to drive a wedge in our relationship. I haven’t seen her since she last entered my workplace (a coffee shop) and I asked her what she wanted (to eat or drink) she said she was just stopping by to say hello and she left. This was about 5 or 6 weeks ago. Last night she was speaking with my boyfriend and she told him that I was rude to her when she saw me last and that I asked her in a very aggressive tone what she wanted. This is simply untrue. As much as I dislike her at times I would never be rude to her out of respect that she’s the man I loves mother. She then proceeded to act childish about her other son and stated that if he doesn’t bring his newborn baby to visit tomorrow that she will not be attending the baby’s christening. I am shocked that she would act like this as it’s extremely immature for a woman her age. I love my boyfriend so dearly but I know when he tells her we’re moving away that she’ll act up and try and turn him against me.

So I’ve already written a post about how my boyfriends family are strange and how my boyfriends brother is a creepy person and now the topic of us getting married has come up and it’s causing major stress in our relationship. We’ve discussed who we would ask to be a part of our wedding and I told him I wanted three bridesmaids but to even it out he has to have three groomsmen which means he has to ask said brother that I’m not comfortable around. I gently reminded him that his brother makes me extremely uncomfortable and that I would prefer if he wasn’t in our wedding party but he is adamant that his brother will be there so we’ve compromised and decided that I will have one bridesmaid and he will have one groomsman and he has chosen his other brother who I have no issues with but i feel awful about the whole situation and I don’t mean to make him feel conflicted but I just can’t stomach to be around his other brother. He has have to have ALL of his teeth removed recently as he declined to brush them and he is extremely overweight and very greasy and scruffy with no job or life at all. He just plays PlayStation all night and sleeps all day and he speaks so inappropriately and makes every conversation sexual and I honestly just feel uneasy when I’m around him and in the heat of the fight I blurted out that I don’t want him around any children that we have and my boyfriend lost it. He said that I can’t keep our children away from their uncle and that they have to have some form of relationship with him and honestly that just doesn’t sit right with me and I told them that if we do have children that I don’t want to be present when he visits his family and that he must not leave our children alone with his brother and that he is never to change their diapers/nappies and he replied that I’m being a horrible person. Am I horrible or am I right?

Welcome / My boyfriends family creep me out!!!!
« on: March 14, 2019, 12:45:30 PM »
I met my boyfriend a year ago after a really horrible year. He has really made me believe in love again and he tells me all the time how much he loves me and how beautiful he thinks I am and we both go above and beyond for each other and I absolutely adore him. There’s one problem. His family! When I first met his mother and his older brother (who is 32, still lives at home, never had a girlfriend or a job and in my opinion a complete waster) she seemed lovely but when I went shopping with my boyfriend and his mother and brother I started getting very weird vibes from them. His mother is extremely childish and she started hiding in aisles in the store and jumping out and trying to scare us. His brother is completely vulgar and I’m good with dirty jokes or comments but he takes the piss! His mother is very clingy to my boyfriend and has made it clear that she thinks he spends too much time with me and throws tantrums if he can’t cancel plans with me to take her somewhere and his brother is just unbelievable. Not that looks matter but he is extremely overweight and has had to have many teeth taken out because he fails in personal hygiene and he stays up all night playing PlayStation and sleeps all day and when he does leave the house it’s always with his mother and so many people have made comments to myself and my boyfriend how strange their relationship is and that they’re uncomfortably close. My boyfriend got him a trial run in his workplace to try and get him into the working world but his demeanor and comments made all the staff so uncomfortable that they begged the boss not to hire him. I’ve spoken to my boyfriend about his but he is adament that there is nothing wrong with his family. His mother also always makes a point of telling me that my boyfriend always used to be up for what they call a laugh which include his older brother tickling him but now he’s not “fun” anymore. I honestly couldn’t make this up but I’m so worried because if i do decide to spend the rest of my life with this man but I honestly don’t think I want my future children to have much to do with his side of the family which is awful I know. Could anybody help me on what to do?

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